Discipline

At first I didn’t think I could do it.  Do what you might ask?  Not drink.

Now I’m no raging alcoholic, but I did enjoy drinks with friends, on the beach, at the cottage, on a Friday night at dinner.  I was what you would probably call a social drinker, but at midnight on New Year’s eve 2020, I made a resolution that I wouldn’t drink for a year.  Why did I do that?  My kids were getting older and watching what I was doing.  I had a good role model in that my mentor didn’t drink, and I admire the life he lives.  Plus I simply wanted to see if I could do it.  So I thought, why not?

The best thing about having a dry year was not that I didn’t drink, but that it showed me I could be disciplined.  I could follow through with a decision and stick to it.  It was a relatively low bar, but I was able to step over it and that first win, is propelling me to more wins.  Today when people refer to me, they say I am a disciplined person.  More importantly, that is part of the story I tell myself now.  That is part of who I am.  I proved it over hundreds of days, and now I’m on to the next challenge: Can I stick with it for the rest of my life?

Here’s something that I learned along the way that might be helpful.  Motivation and inspiration get you started, but discipline gets you finished.  What I like most about discipline is it appeals to the lazy part of me.  I tell myself ‘I’ve already made that decision, just go and do it.’  And so I do.  The flip side to this of course is taking the time to make those decisions about how you’re going to spend your time, or what you’re going to do, and adjusting periodically.  But once you’ve made the decision, you don’t have to do that again.  That precious mental energy can be used for something else.  Discipline frees you to be creative because the basics are taken care of.

For example: I go to bed between 10 and 11, and I get up between 5 and 6.  That’s enough sleep for me, and I get so much done in the mornings, I wouldn’t give that time to anyone or anything else.  And really, what are you doing after 10 or 11 at night anyways that is going to make all the difference for you in the world?  Watching a show?  How are the Kardashians going to make the difference you’re looking for in your life?

When I played hockey, there were guys who were much more talented than I was.  I especially admired those who could stick handle the puck in such smooth ways, it almost seemed like it was velcroed to their stick.  But most interestingly it wasn’t the talent of those guys that determined who made it to the NHL, it was how much discipline they had.  Being good was simply a requirement.  It was the guys who spent the 10,000+ hours doing what needed to be done to make it, who actually made it.  It was the guys who worked on their talents, and honed them into a weapon that made the defence useless.  It was the discipline to take the raw material and work it into something better was what made the difference.

The one problem that I have with discipline is the way it’s used as punishment.  That person was out of line, and so they got disciplined.  I think that has damaged the perception of discipline more than anything else.  Discipline is not punishment.  Discipline is the key to success and self discipline is the ability to make yourself do, what you should do, when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not.  It’s the running in the rain, just because you run every day.  It’s the making those calls, just because you know if you do, you’ll hit your numbers.  It’s the doing of the thing because you know that will take you farther down the path to reaching your goals and dreams.

This brings me to the final two points about discipline.  The first is by making the decision to do something, then carrying out the execution of that thing, even if it sucks today, you know deep down that tomorrow you will be grateful you did it.  When you are seen the results, you won’t remember the cold mornings.  You won’t remember the grind.  When you’re at the top of the mountain, it will all be worth it.  So do something today, that tomorrow you will be grateful for.

The second thing is when you start living a disciplined life, the repetition can get a little tiresome.  It can make it feel like you’re sucking the joy out of life, at least at first.  So like any system that builds up pressure, you have to let off steam.  So as counter-intuitive as it seems, occasionally, with great discretion, misbehave.  You’ll be better for it.