Rejection

I didn’t get into the co-op program at Laurier.  I didn’t make the Junior B team I wanted, and didn’t get drafted into the OHL.  I asked girls to dance, and got told no.  After living with 5 guys in 2nd year, I didn’t get asked back to live with them in 3rd year and had to find new roommates.  When I was in sales, I had to make 100 cold calls to get one sale.  That’s 99 no’s, all day, every day.

I have been rejected.  Hard.  It hurts to think about these things and the emotions after years are still fresh.  Humbling to say the least.

Rejection is a part of life, and ironically the first job I chose out of school was as an outside salesman for a promotional products company.  So I was selling stuff to people, they didn’t really need and getting a sale was mostly luck.  After all, you have to find the right person, at the right place, and the right time who is looking for something that’s pretty optional most of the time.  When I chose to become a promotional products salesman, I knew I was going to face rejection, but I had no idea how much.  I heard no, again, and again, no, all day every day.

So how did I deal with no?  There were two main ways.  The first was realizing this wasn’t a life or death situation.  Despite the fact the products I was selling would help their business, would help them grow, create great goodwill and sense of belonging, some people just didn’t want them for a variety of reasons well beyond my control.

This brought me to the primary realization after a few painful months of self doubt: it wasn’t me they were rejecting, it was the offer.  They just didn’t need what I was selling at that moment.  It was nothing personal.  It was nothing against me.  It was the offer.

So how did I spin that negative rejection into something that I’d be excited about getting out of bed in the morning for?  I gamified it.  I was getting married, buying a house, and starting life.  I needed the money, and a sales job was going to get me the money I needed in the quickest way possible. 

So I did the math. 

One hundred cold calls, would result in 3 to 4 meetings, and one sale.  So all I had to do was more cold calls, and I’d get more sales, and make more money.  Every no brought me one step closer to a yes.  But I had to get over myself and my fear of rejection first.  It became a game, but like working out and getting callus’ on your hands, I had to develop a callus in my mind.  I’ve heard ‘no’ more times than I care to count, and that’s OK because each no brings me one step closer to a yes.

One of the by-products of rejection is negative thinking.  I’m not good enough, smart enough, fast enough, tall enough, pretty enough, funny enough… whatever it is you feel inadequate.  This is highly demotivating.  You’re going to want to stop doing whatever it is you’re doing if these are the stories you tell yourself, and how you speak to yourself.  A secret of of life is realizing positive thinking doesn’t always work, but negative thinking always does.  So do your best to think positively.

Now let’s take a moment and analyze the results of those big rejections.  I didn’t make the hockey team I wanted to make that would have resulted in my going to a US university.  That rejection enabled me to go to a Canadian university, where I met the love of my life, and started a wonderful family. 

Remember the guys who rejected me in university and chose someone else to have as a roommate?  They got screwed over by the guy who took my place and failed out of school and ended up having to pay his rent.  In my final year one of the guys moved back in with me in my spacious apartment and became best man at my wedding. 

All those rejections as a salesman, I now own PromotionalProducts.com, and I’ve made me millions of dollars in sales over the years as a result.  It’s amazing how good rejection can be for you.